I Wonder

I'm sitting here staring at the mirror. Staring at myself. It's 1:41 in the morning.

I received an e-mail from my Aunt earlier this evening, whose husband has terminal cancer. It was short and sweet, but essentially she said that he is expected to live for 15 hours from this very minute. Being who I am, I sent a long, three page e-mail in response. I didn't talk much about his condition, and in fact I avoided using the term "death" or "dying" entirely. I wrote about simple things, important things in life, and sent some pictures. I was certain to make it humorous. And it seems funny to me that I spent so much time writing this letter to a person who may never read it. He may have already passed on in his sleep on this ordinary night. The sun will still come up tomorrow.

Perhaps he will surprise the doctors and live to see another day, a week even, or a year. Who knows. But as I sit here staring at this mirrored glass, I wonder why I care about trivial things, when my Uncle could have stared into the same surface a few hours ago, instead wondering whether he would ever see that face again. His own face.

I sit and stare. And wonder.





I hope he will rise with the sun tomorrow. I hope he will read my letter. Maybe I will get to call him. Life is strange.

Current Mood: Sad

Listening To: The Refrigerator in the Common Room